You've been seeing each other for a while and it seems that, with each moment spent, the two of you are getting closer on all levels. You're pretty certain that he might be "the one" but, yet, every time the subject of making things permanent comes up he seems to hesitate or even pull back. So you find yourself asking: How can I get him to commit to me? I thought I had met my soul mate.
You were hoping he would say "Yes" immediately to your inquiry about whether or not the relationship is going anywhere. Instead, he may be holding back, not because he doesn't care about you, but may not want to get hurt down the road. Here are 4 things that will help you in getting him to the next level in your relationship.
1. Pick the right time - This is one of the most important things to think about. Pick a time when you are both in a good mood and the place is quiet with no distracting energy around either of you like TV or a football game. Then ask him if he is interested in a committed relationship with you.
2. Know thyself - It never hurts to take a close look at your own actions and reactions to see if, in fact, YOU are ready for a commitment. You may discover that now is not the time for you to enter into a long-term relationship; not that it couldn't happen at a later date. Remember that if you are projecting, even subconsciously with your own doubts, he may well be reacting to those feelings. Being honest with yourself is a big step in being able to bring about the romantic promise of tomorrow you seek.
3. Be honest - Now that you have brought it up and he's responding like a deer in the headlights, it is time for you to let him digest the issue. It is also time to really be honest with him about how you feel in the relationship with him. This is when he may really start to open up and be truthful about what he fears most about commitment. It could be that he was the victim in a breakup and was very hurt by it. Now is your big opportunity to make him know how much he really means to you.
4. Opportunity - Facing the truth of what he may have to say is unnerving at best. If he says "Yes" it's a green light. If he says he's not ready yet and needs more time, this is your opportunity to stay and wait for him to be ready. He may need more time than you for that big of a decision. It is a gamble that he will be ready or not, but nothing ventured is certain to lead to nothing gained.
Your biggest fear at this point may be rejection if he says "No" or isn't really ready yet. On the other hand, when your future is at stake and he says "Yes", the magic will return to you as you vow to be committed to each other. The feelings you will have cannot be matched when you have found your future and commitment, because it truly is like magic.
You were hoping he would say "Yes" immediately to your inquiry about whether or not the relationship is going anywhere. Instead, he may be holding back, not because he doesn't care about you, but may not want to get hurt down the road. Here are 4 things that will help you in getting him to the next level in your relationship.
1. Pick the right time - This is one of the most important things to think about. Pick a time when you are both in a good mood and the place is quiet with no distracting energy around either of you like TV or a football game. Then ask him if he is interested in a committed relationship with you.
2. Know thyself - It never hurts to take a close look at your own actions and reactions to see if, in fact, YOU are ready for a commitment. You may discover that now is not the time for you to enter into a long-term relationship; not that it couldn't happen at a later date. Remember that if you are projecting, even subconsciously with your own doubts, he may well be reacting to those feelings. Being honest with yourself is a big step in being able to bring about the romantic promise of tomorrow you seek.
3. Be honest - Now that you have brought it up and he's responding like a deer in the headlights, it is time for you to let him digest the issue. It is also time to really be honest with him about how you feel in the relationship with him. This is when he may really start to open up and be truthful about what he fears most about commitment. It could be that he was the victim in a breakup and was very hurt by it. Now is your big opportunity to make him know how much he really means to you.
4. Opportunity - Facing the truth of what he may have to say is unnerving at best. If he says "Yes" it's a green light. If he says he's not ready yet and needs more time, this is your opportunity to stay and wait for him to be ready. He may need more time than you for that big of a decision. It is a gamble that he will be ready or not, but nothing ventured is certain to lead to nothing gained.
Your biggest fear at this point may be rejection if he says "No" or isn't really ready yet. On the other hand, when your future is at stake and he says "Yes", the magic will return to you as you vow to be committed to each other. The feelings you will have cannot be matched when you have found your future and commitment, because it truly is like magic.
No comments:
Post a Comment