Tuesday, 7 October 2014

A Few Basic Parenting Tips For Raising Teenagers

By Jocelyn Davidson


Having a teen in the house can be a challenge. Teens have entered that stormy part of their lives where they change in every conceivable way. Their bodies change, their hormones race, their emotions are jumbled and they struggle to interact with the world within which they grew up. This can cause conflict, even anger and rebelliousness. By keeping a few basic parenting tips for raising teenagers in mind parents can learn to cope with this stage and help their teens cope better.

One of the most important child rearing skills remains the ability to show the teen that he or she is loved and cherished. They need to know that their parents love them at all times and that their love is unconditional. Teens often say or do things that hurt their parents. They may sulk or withdraw from the family. Knowing that they are loved will help temper their behavior.

Teens must understand that they are part of a household where every member should be treated with consideration. This means that there must be at least some rules. It may be best to discuss the ground rules during a family conference. Every member, including the teen, should have the chance to provide input and once consensus is achieved, the rules should be inviolate. Non compliance must have consequences and those consequences must not be negotiable.

Teens can be impulsive and they are most likely to experiment. Many teens use alcohol for the first time, or they try smoking. Others decide to have a tattoo or to have their bodies pierced. It would be a mistake to expressly forbid such experimentation. Parents should rather encourage their teens to gather as much information as possible before taking action. In many cases it will help if the teen agrees to a cooling off period before acting on a new whim.

Teens often act as if they are worldly wise and informed but are in fact deeply insecure and even naive. They often accept information received from their peers as gospel. In this way they often make catastrophic mistakes. Parents can help by making sure their teens are properly informed on sexual matters, the many dangers lurking online and the potential consequences of experimenting with drugs.

It is vitally important that parents set a positive example for their teens to follow. They need to show their teen that it is honorable to acknowledge mistakes and that there is no shame in apologizing. Parents should also be careful to make sure that they are not guilty of the exact same mistake that they are warning their teens against. It is hypocritical to warn a teen against the dangers of alcohol, for example, when the parents regularly over indulge themselves.

Teens generally respond well when they are respected and trusted. It is therefore a good idea to make it clear to the teen that his opinions are valued and welcomed. When family decisions are made, it is important to specifically ask the teen what his opinion is and to then take his opinion seriously. It may also be a good idea to tell the teen that he has reached an age where he can be trusted with increased responsibilities.

Parents should remember that their teens are experiencing extraordinary changes. They are on the brink of adulthood and they are often scared and unsure of themselves. Parents should provide a safe haven full of love, understanding and support. This will give the teen confidence.




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