Wednesday 25 December 2013

Grasping Effective Communication Skills For Couples

By Harriett Crosby


According to recently conducted surveys on married couples, the toll of the regular workday leaves little energy for lovers to improve their love relationship. May people in a marriage lack the effective communication skills for couples to maintain intimacy. The worst thing is for one of the parties to the marriage to hold misconceptions about the foundations of a lasting relationship.

At its simplest, communication represents a flow of views, concerns and ideas between two parties without discriminating the source. After voicing your idea, you must humbly await the response from your other half before expressing the next thing on your mind. Even in the event that your partner is wrong, you must lie low and let them tell you why they choose to differ from your point of view.

Even if you are giving a listening ear, never push your real emotions under the carpet in a bid to please your partner. Every person will naturally have a differing opinion about any topic being discussed and this fact must be respected at all times. If a costly mistake has been made, do not waste time trying to blame each other, suggest what you as an individual could have done to avoid it.

Misunderstanding a spouse is the surest recipe for a heated argument. To get their point, you must have good listening skills and take time to mentally digest what they said. A good listener will give unwavering eye contact and combine it with body language such as nodding the head or repeating their words for clarity. It is not advisable to infer their meaning based on some experience you had in the past as it comes off as a rude gesture.

Raising your voice at a partner makes them feel insignificant at the moment, so it is better to avoid it altogether. Sometimes, it pays to just leave a hot topic for another day when your minds are settled. Marriage in itself is a complicated affair that calls for endurance and sacrifice to keep it working. It is not possible for the stranger that is your spouse to fully understand your fears, wants or opinions.

One thing individuals starting marriage life should try is to separate issues. Just because the boss gave you a rough time at office does not give you the authority to let it out on your innocent wife at home. Some emotion can be contagious, talking with a happy person may make you happier ad vice versa.

Respecting your lover also means treating them with the same respect that you accord another individuals you interact with on a daily basis. Insulting them will eventually culminate in disrespect and an untimely end to an otherwise healthy relationship. More often than not, what matters is not what you are saying but how you will say it. Obscenities will not make you feel better but will dampen the moods of a listener.

Silence when you are hurting inside will only result in short lived peace. Dedicate a stipulated length of time every day to abandon all else and reach out to a spouse. The above are merely part of the concepts spelt out to people attending sessions on effective communication skills for couples.




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