Thursday 28 November 2013

Cultivating Patience When You Are Still In Love With Your Ex

By Gayle Hendrix


Wanting to regain the love of someone that you feel very strongly for is an honorable goal. Wanting to love and be loved is a human need, after all. None of us wants to spend our life alone and only a few times in your life do you meet someone that you truly connect with.

This might sound like a stupid questions but are you sure that you really love your ex boyfriend? Do you love him or do you just want to get him back? Find out the truth before you move forward with your plans to win him over.

There are many different problems that happen in a romantic relationship that can lead to a breakup. Sometimes we make mistakes that we later regret. Perhaps our partner becomes the target of someone else's charming ways and flattery and they are lured away from us. Other times life gets in the way of our relationship and problems with family, friends, money, time and general problems in life cause us to drift apart in our relationship.

I know this sounds strange but there is a big difference between loving someone and wanting to posess them. Loving your ex boyfriend means that you want the best for him and you want him to be happy. You can still love him without even seeing him again. You can close your eyes and think of him and wish that good things happen in his life. You can remember good times you had and be happy for the time that you had together. Loving him doesn't require that he tell you that he loves you or for him to even like you. If you love him you simply love him.

Any time you feel these doubts and anxieties coming to mind when you start to think about getting back together with your ex, look past them and know that in the future things will be different. Your ability to get back together with your girlfriend is all within your hands and the sooner you get your life back together and get back to being the kind of guy that she used to enjoy spending time with, the sooner she'll be back in your life again.

In addition, it's natural for someone to reject you when you are putting too much pressure on them. You might love your partner with every bit of your heart and adore them more than anyone else in the word but there's a difference between desiring to be in a romantic relationship with someone that you love and being desperate to be in a romantic relationship with someone that you love. Desperation is an ugly and very unattractive force that can be felt by your ex. It is seen in your body language and how you are almost begging them to love you. Desperation repulses people sometimes without them even knowing why. Most people will say that they feel uneasy around someone that is desperate. You may have even experienced this at one point in your life when you had no interest in spending time with someone who seemed very nice to everyone else around you.

Be sure in your heart that you are worthy of the love that you desire. Feel it in every part of your being. You deserve to be loved by that one special person. It's natural. If you truly love your ex then you will be patient and understanding. You can put your own needs aside and take advantage of this time alone to work on yourself. Spend some time thinking about things from your ex's point of view. How would you feel if you needed some space and time to figure things out in your relationship but your partner was being selfish and kept on pressuring you? Give your ex all the space and time they need and then surprise them when they do check to see how you've been doing.

Try these exercises for a week or two and see if you notice any changes in your boyfriend. In addition, spend some time thinking about loving him selflessly. Try to love him without thinking about yourself or your needs and see if there is a change in you. You very well might lose the anxiety and stress and depression often associated with a breakup and you might find that he starts showing you a little more attention.




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